Scanning Bernard

I finally got an appointment for the PET-CT scan, which is today, so right now I’m ‘relaxing’ on a bed/couch thing while the radioactive stuff makes its way around my system. Half an hour or so of scan then home again, avoiding all pregnant women and small children for eight hours, just in case they turn into Spiderman or something.

And then, in a few days, we’ll find out whether this spot on the liver is cancerous or not, and whether life is going to get slightly more complicated or a lot more. If it is, it’s a bigger operation and chemo for sure, but if it’s not, they just whip out a foot of bowel and its gone, we hope. There may still be a bit of chemo, but we don’t know for sure yet. At least in a few days we’ll know one of the many unknowns of this whole process. People often say the not knowing is almost the worst part, and they’re right. ‘Fortunately’, I’ve had enough to occupy me, what with Julie’s cancer, work, parents, home and everything, so haven’t really had too much time to think about it.

More when I know it!

5 thoughts on “Scanning Bernard

  1. I wrote you a poem the other day, well to Bernard actually – but – stupidly I was doing it on my phone, using the comment fields here. I spent a while on it, enjoying the creative process but then when I tried to post it, all was lost at the login stage. I was really upset and spent another half an hour trying to find some sort of ghost record of it by hitting backspace and hunting for it in the endless garble of the cache. But alas – it was lost forever. Arse.

    It had some good lines, all revolving around the frustration you must undoubtedly be feeling with having to wait to hear about something you probably, definitely might have or not have. So I’ve had another go, it’s not as good this time and much shorter and less clever… but ultimately the sentiment is there.

    Ode to Bernard

    The has been,
    that never will.

    The might be,
    that never was.

    The half a chance of no chance.

    The certainty of maybe not.

    The donkey round the corner.


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